It’s 7:02am but I’ve been up since 5:30 just sitting in bed. It was a struggle getting out of bed (my mind was going in places it shouldn’t be) but listening to the rain made me happy. I know I would come down and open all my beautiful white shutters so I could see the clouds and hear the rain coming down. I wasn’t energetic enough to come down before J was up – which that is a magical time – when no one in the house is up, and it’s dark and quiet, and my thoughts can race.
My thoughts race anyway.
I’m obsessed with work right now. I have so many projects and I don’t know where to move forward so I’ve been impatiently waiting for 3 weeks for my boss to get back. Really it’s been 4 weeks or almost 5, considering we were in our Kaizen, and then workshop, and then two weeks separated, and blah blah blah. I just want to sit here and work on reports, or content, or emails I need to send out to “get ahead”. I’m glad my brain is having fun but it makes me wonder how much I use things as a shield.
Probably a lot.
I was so good and went down to Fashion Island to have lunch with my Mama yesterday. I worked for an hour or so, freaking out to my AI about my priority list and an email that just came in from the president and it told me to turn off my computer. So I went an had lunch and then we went shopping. We went Christmas shopping.
Did we buy any presents for other people?
No, we did not. But I got the COZIEST – coziest – cashmere sweater, amazing jeans, cutest striped shirt… amazing, gorgeous, comfy, black heeled boots for winter. Two skirts, and the cutest mini-dress that goes so well with those boots.
Retail therapy? Why yes.
We should not enable ourselves like that but it’s so fun.
I need to spend some time in my closet today organizing. What shall I wear on Monday? What shall I wear on Thursday for my LA Tech Week adventure?
Why am I going to LA three weeks in a row?
Adventures!
G texted me yesterday and… (had to go check)… said “I wrote a big thing for K like to break up and im gonna send it when she’s done hanging out with her friends I think”.
Sigh. My poor baby. First off, ahhhh he texted me about it. And second, SO HARD. I said that – that must have been so hard, and are you okay, and also do you really think you should text her? What about doing it over the phone and actually speaking to her.
Sigh. I couldn’t resist. Either way, he said that he was listening to his body “just like you said” and “I was really sad when writing it” and then he felt relief after he was done.
Holy shit, how do my children do this better than I do? I guess that’s the point, right? Poor guy. And dang, I am so proud of him. He took himself off to go see a play (Dear Evan Hansen) but I thought he was going to the movies? But no, I checked his bank account and he spent $80 on a ticket, and then took the trolley down to Old Town and then maybe the bus?
In a hurricane/tropical storm.
Sigh. He’s at his dorm this morning so I guess it worked out.
He also listened to the Happiness podcast that I sent him from Simon Sinek and Arthur Brooks. That also makes me happy. Like what, my kids listen to me?
I actually think they listen to me too closely and I really need to watch my words and be careful. I was talking to G about his 2nd major and encouraging him to look at different ideas and possibly go to the Career Center and get coached on some ideas and he brought it up later and it felt like he was taking that as what he has to do, rather than an idea.
I was like whoa, I’m just giving you advice. You don’t actually have to take it. But I’m the authority figure here and he’s taking it as gospel so… I have to be careful about that. I did follow up later.
S is the same way. All of her health stuff right now.
Sigh.
But she DID take some of my words as gospel but it took forever and now she is testing out gluten free. Her bloated feeling and stomach stuff is so hard.
She helped me with my first needle injection.
Man, I had a huge anxiety attack taking it out of the fridge. But I was like, let’s do this. I don’t want to think about it.
And it was done.
So easy.
Sucked. But so easy!
I need to organize today. I want to fiddle. I want to read. I want to get a pedicure.
I will do all of those things, I think.
But first to work out.
I have no good photos in my camera of the rain so putting my fitting room experience as a placeholder for featured.
7:26am.
